Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Trumps First Day, Oh And, I Believe I Can Fly!

Trump's first day
1. President Donald Trump and Vice President Marco Rubio
are sworn into office.
2. In a rare event on inauguration day, Congress convenes
for an emergency meeting to repeal the illegal and unconstitutional
Socialist healthcare farce known as Obamacare.
The new Director of Health and Social Services Dr. Ben Carson
announces that an independent group of healthcare management
professionals is hired to handle healthcare services for poor and low
income people. They are also assigned the duty of eliminating
Medicare and Medicaid fraud.
Government’s costs for public healthcare are reduced by 90%.
Healthcare insurance premiums for working Americans are reduced
by 50%.
The move saves billions of taxpayer paid dollars. Healthcare service in the U.S improves 100%.
3. Newly appointed Department of Homeland Security Chief
Ted Cruz announces the immediate deployment of troops to the U.S.
Mexico border to control illegal immigration and the immediate
deportation of illegals with criminal records or links to terrorist
New bio-encrypted Social Security IDs are required by every
American citizen.
Birthright is abolished.
All immigration from countries that represent a threat to the safety of
American citizens is terminated indefinitely. The move saves
American taxpayers billions of dollars.
Several prisons are closed.
4. Newly appointed Secretary of Business and Economic
Development Carly Fiorina eliminates more than half of the
Government agencies operating under the Obama administration,
saving taxpayers billions of dollars. Stocks rise 100%.
5. Newly appointed Director of Government Finance Rand Paul
announces the abolition of the IRS and displays a copy of the new
Federal Tax Return form. It consists of one page. The instructions
consist of two pages. The Federal Reserve is audited. The move
saves American Taxpayers billions of dollars and increases tax
6. Hillary Clinton is in prison. Her cell is directly across from Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton who are serving time for ‘Hate Crimes”.
She bitches at them constantly from behind the bars of her cell in
what some might call cruel and unusual punishment.
7. Bernie Sanders is in the nuthouse, where he belongs. His
room is directly across from Nancy Pelosi, Debbie Wasserman
Schultz, Chris Matthews and Al Franken. They meet for tea every
day at 10 AM and discuss the success and benefits of Communism
and Socialism throughout the world.
They also wonder when the Mothership” is going to pick them
up and return them to their home planets.
8. Windows 12 is released. It is designed for humans,
doesn’t try to satisfy the needs of every person on the planet,
doesn’t require a degree in nuclear physics to operate and looks just
like Windows 7 except it is easier to use.
9. Barack Obama flees the United States under cover of
darkness and returns to his homeland of Kenya before his trial for
treason begins. He deplanes on a remote jungle airstrip. It was
reported that he was last seen wandering through the jungle singing
“Hakuna Matata” with a chimp named Commie.
10. Oscar Meyer announces the introduction of a new
cholesterol and fat free pepperoni that tastes just like regular
11. Not to be outdone, Kraft Foods announces the
introduction of several varieties of cholesterol and fat free cheeses
that taste just like regular cheese.
12. A committee is not established to determine what is
causing global cooling. Billions of taxpayer dollars are saved.
13. Dead people are no longer allowed to vote in Chicago, a
huge blow for the Democrat Party in the State of Illinois.

Thanks to Jimmie Elzner, on FB

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